Being a Mom

Some of the very best of the best things in life can go unacknowledged. Being a mom is often one of them. Though I never EVER take my role of mother for granted, I seldom talk about the pure joy that comes from being a mom. So as Mother’s Day is just days away, I want to talk about it and give it a well-deserved 5 Heart Rating.

My son just (re)posted this to Instagram. Small print so here’s what it says: “I cherish them too and I love you too. Talks with you and Mom are the best and most important conversations of my life. I carry them with me wherever I go.”

I just got off the phone with my son. When we talk, we almost always preceed the phonecall with a text confirming that we are both available because we know it won’t be a short call. There’s never lack for subject matter. I could talk to either of my adult children anytime for hours at a time. And I have, many many times over the years. They are both two of the greatest communicators I know. So when I got off the phone with my son, I sat for a while and just contemplated. I thought about the conversation itself and what it has meant to me to be a mom.

Though my son is 16 months older than his sister, there was a period of time she was much taller. They are seen here examining the inside of a honeysuckle. Their love and appreciation for nature came with them to this world. I’ve learned to pause more and notice nature because of them.

From the moment I found out I was pregnant for the first time, I was elated. I always knew I’d be. I have no idea how I knew this. I just did. As the oldest daughter in a family of 9 children, I made up my mind early on that I would have just one if I could and adopt more if possible. And if I couldn’t actually give birth myself, then I would adopt as I absolutely love the concept of adoption.

To say the same elation was not there when I found out I was already pregnant with my second child would be an understatement. I had a 7-month-old, was still nursing while living in a new country, working and commuting two hours each way, trying to learn Japanese, building a house, and getting familiar with a very new and different way of living. I think I was really just in shock more than disappointed.

Of course, from the moment my beautiful daughter entered the world I was once again, elated. And have been ever since. The experience of being “mom” to these two incredible old souls has been unmatched by anything I have done in my life. By far.

I cannot count the number of times people have said really nice things about my children. How many times they’ve told me what a great job I did raising them, to which I always answer, “They raised me.” My reply is almost always met with laughter since people think I’m kidding. I could not be more serious. I also think that, as science is proving, children/babies come to this world with hundreds of psychological traits and that they are not a blank slate. And as a mom, “You are a shepherd. You don’t design the sheep.”

A rare photo of all three of us over a decade ago. Drawback to one or all three living thousands of miles apart.

When I take the time and really think about all the things I’ve learned from my children, I am amazed. With some childhood stresses and learning limitations, I didn’t really develop a love for learning until my kids started school and I became interested in what they were getting from their incredible teachers, especially at their Montessori education. And when they started to really express themselves, I paid attention. Their opinions have meant more to me than anyone’s and it is only recent that I can see why, so clearly.

From tears of pure joy watching my beautiful daughter’s ballet or fighting tears when my son didn’t get up right away after being laid out on the football field, I would choose my role as a mom over any other again and again. It definitely is the top 5 Heart Rating of my life.

So as Mother’s Day comes and goes I will celebrate being a mom. It’s unlike anything I have ever done. There are all kinds of moms out there that have accepted the hugely important role of shepherding their sheep. I hope each and every one realizes the importance of this.

Happy Mother’s Day to all moms every single day!